Unit 1

Discussing Conflict: Introduction to Peace by Peace

Goals:

The students will…

Be introduced to their classroom teachers and Peace by Peace.
Become interested in Peace by Peace.
Get to know the Peace by Peace volunteers.
Create community rules.
Define “conflict” and “fight”.
Discuss why people fight.
Show that conflicts have causes and consequences.
Show that the consequences (results) of a conflict are often also causes.
Show how escalation and de-escalation work.
Show that personal decisions effect which direction you move on the escalation staircase.

The volunteers will…

Get to know the students
Facilitate the accomplishment of the student goals.

Materials:

Nametags
Posterboard

Methods:

I. Opening Activity, Engage the students: Introduction/Fake Fight

II. Thinking about Conflict: Silent Quiz

III. Introductions: Abridged Name Game

IV. Defining Conflict: Conflict Tree and Conflict Staircase

V. Example of De-escalator: Cooperation (Human Pretzel Game)

VI. Closing Activity: Evaluation Questions

Preparation:

Read through this lesson completely.
Create nametags (blank if you don’t know your student’s names yet).
Familiarize yourself with the difference between “conflict” and “fight”.
Create a script for the fake fight and practice it.

I. Opening Activity: Engage the students: Fake Fight/Introduction

(estimated time, 10 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Engage the students in Peace by Peace
Introduce ourselves and Peace by Peace
Distinguish between a fight and a conflict

This activity is designed to engage the students in Peace by Peace and to get them thinking critically about conflicts.

The activity begins as if you are introducing yourself then turns into a fight. After you break character, finish your introductions. Follow that with a discussion and brainstorm session.

Begin as if introducing Peace by Peace.

For example, “Hi. My name is ___ and this is ___ . We’re students at Yale and we’re going to come into your class this year every week to talk about some things that are really important in your lives and in ours. We’d like to start with an activity to show you what we’re all about. ___ will tell you what to do.”

At this point, act out an argument.

For example, teachers often use an argument concerning who is supposed to lead the next part of the lesson.

Try to include as many of the following as possible in your fake fight:

Accusations
Escalation to insults
Interrupting
Name calling
Lying
Talking at the same time
Disrespect
Yelling
Spilling secrets
Physical threat
One teacher storming out of the room

After the physical threat or a teacher storming out of the room (or both), break character and discuss what just happened.

Finish introducing yourself

Tell the students that you’re from Peace by Peace and that throughout the year you’re going to be talking about fights and ways to prevent them without violence.
Tell the students that as a reward for their hard work, we host a Festival for them in the spring.

During the festival, all the students from all the Peace by Peace classes in New Haven come to Yale for the day. They go through really fun workshops put on by different Yale groups like sports teams and dance groups. The students will find out much more about the Festival in the spring.

Make sure to distinguish between a fight and a conflict by asking the students for definitions. Basically, a fight is a conflict that gets out of control.

A conflict happens when two people are in opposition or when they differ.
A fight is a quarrel, an argument, or an attempt to harm or gain power over someone by blows (emotional or physical).

Ask the students to tell you exactly what happened during your fake fight and write everything they come up with on the board in the form of a brainstorm list.

They should identify elements like lying, insults, threats, accusations, anger, tone of voice, fear, self-esteem, etc.

Once the students are out of ideas, tell that that you’re going to do some general brainstorming about conflicts in the form of the Name Game.

II. Brainstorm about Conflicts: The Name Game

(estimated time, 10 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Come up with a list of words relating to conflict, including escalators and de-escalators.
Get to know the students’ names.

This is a simple version of the traditional Name Game, but students do not repeat what all the previous people have said because of time restraints.

Ask the students to go around the circle and tell you their name and the first thing that comes to mind when they think about conflict. They should not repeat something that was already said.

Encourage the students to get ideas from the fake fight or from fights they have recently seen or been involved with. Give them a few examples before you begin, like yelling, body language, and insults.

After each students’ response, add what they said to the brainstorm list you have from the Opening Activity.

Feel free to hand out nametags before or during this activity.

Note: The importance of learning the students’ names cannot be emphasized enough. Take several weeks and actively try to learn their names – it will be invaluable to your relationship with the students and your success as a Peace by Peace teacher. Knowing a student’s name shows that you care about them.

III. Discussing Conflict: Conflict Tree and Conflict Staircase

(estimated time, 10-15 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Show that conflicts have causes and consequences.
Show that the consequences (results) of a conflict are often also causes.
Show how escalation and de-escalation work.
Show that personal decisions effect which direction you move on the staircase.
Discuss why people fight.

You will be using the brainstorm list that the students came up with in the last two activities as the basis for this discussion.

Draw a tree on the blackboard. Label the roots “causes” and the branches “results”.

Explain to the students that conflicts have causes, which often makes the issue grow larger. Explain that conflicts also have results or effects. Ask the students for an example of a time that they got into a conflict over a minor issue, but it grew into a much larger one; make sure to identify the causes and the effects.

Ask the students which words on the list they have are causes of conflict. Make an X next to each one.

Then ask the students which words on the list are effects of the conflict. Make a check mark next to each result. The students should find that some words belong on both the causes and the results lists.

*Make the point that sometimes the results of a conflict are also causes of new conflict. In this way, a conflict can grow from a little issue into a bigger issue, and can even turn into a fight.

To show them this another way, draw a staircase and a little person in the middle of the staircase. Define the words “escalator” and “de-escalator”:

An escalator is something a person does that makes a conflict worse.
A de-escalator is something a person does that makes a conflict better.

Say the person on the staircase is in a conflict. If they have, for example, a knife, that is an escalator and it makes the conflict worse, so the conflict grows and they move up the staircase. But if that person, for example, apologizes for something they know they did wrong, then that is a de-escalator and it makes the conflict better and the person moves down the staircase.

*Make the point that personal decisions determine whether you make the conflict better or worse, and whether you move up and down the staircase.

Relate the staircase to the fake fight: have the students tell what happened, which decisions were made, and what could have happened if different decisions had been made.

Ask the students for some other examples of escalators and de-escalators. Try to get the students to come up with as many of these as possible by asking appropriate questions; tell the students important ones that they miss:

Escalators

Fear
Peer pressure
Weapons
Pride
*Tone of voice
*Facial expressions
Drugs
Alcohol
Self-esteem
Bad communication
Body language
Being close to the other person (in their face)
Anger

De-escalators

Listening
*Tone of voice
*Facial expressions
Compromise
Letting the other person speak
Relaxing
Thinking from the other person’s point of view
Respect
Not telling the other person that they are “wrong”

Tell the students that throughout the rest of the year in Peace by Peace, you’re going to talk a lot about these different de-escalators (ways to make the conflict better). You’re not here to lecture them about not fighting, but just to get them thinking about what decisions they are making and whether the consequences/results are what they really wanted. First, here are some questions for them:

Are conflicts always between two individuals?

No, there are conflicts between communities, between individuals and the community, etc.

Is a conflict always bad?

No. When people disagree, that’s how change happens. Friend can get to know each other better; friendships and families can get stronger. People can look at the world a different way.
It is only when a conflict turns into a fight that it is bad.

What are some reasons that people fight?

For example, money, power, territory, religion, pride, hate, habit, politics, etc.

What role does anger have in conflicts? Are there any constructive uses of anger?

When people are angry, a conflict turns into a fight.

Now that they understand escalation and de-escalation, you’re going to look at one example of de-escalation: cooperation.

Note: The issues of this discussion are the basis of the Peace by Peace program. Take your time and make sure the students understand these difficult concepts. Also, make sure to remind them week after week about the definitions of escalation and de-escalation – these are very big words for 6^th graders, but they are all capable of understanding them and remembering what they mean.

IV. Cooperation: The Human Pretzel and Community Rules

(estimated time, 20 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Engage the students in Peace by Peace.
Discuss one important de-escalator.
Come up with Community Rules.

This is a great game to illustrate working together. The students usually love it, so after they’ve played it once, it also works well as a reward for good behavior later on in the year if you have extra time. Because cooperation is essential to most other de-escalators, it is a fundamental concept.

After giving instructions, divide the class up into 2 or 3 groups of 8-10 students.

The students will stand in a circle in their group.
Each student should grab two other hands in the circle.
The students must not grab the hand of the person next to them, or two hands from the same person if this activity is to work.
The group should untangle themselves without letting go of any hands.

Follow the activity with a discussion.

Note: students often blame other students by name for what went wrong with the game. Please ask them to comment only on their own behavior or the behavior of the group as a whole if this happens

Did this work in your group? Why or why not?
What was hard about this activity?
What made this activity work in your group? (Or, if it didn’t work, what could you have done

Cooperation (note: this is a big word for many 6^th graders, but it is an important one to learn. Feel free to give them the word “cooperation” if they answer “we had to work together”.)

What does cooperation have to do with conflicts?
What happens if people don’t cooperate?

Because it is really important that people cooperate with each other, your students should come up with some Community Rules; ask them to think, not just to regurgitate their regular classroom rules (all of which still apply during Peace by Peace). Some examples of what they might come up with are:

Respect each other.
Don’t touch/hit other people, even in role playing.
Don’t swear.
Don’t talk about things said within Peace by Peace outside of this classroom.
One person should talk at a time; raise hands.

Write the rules on the posterboard you brought with you (preferably taped to the board) and bring this poster with you each time you come in to the classroom.

V. Closing Activity: Thinking about Conflict: Silent Quiz

(estimated time, 5 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Remind the students of what they have learned.
Get the students thinking about the relevance of Peace by Peace to their own lives.

Tell the students that you just covered a lot of information and you want to review for a minute all the things they learned.

As for a definition of conflict, fight, escalator, and de-escalator.
Ask what the point of the conflict tree was.

To show that conflicts have causes and effects.

Ask what the conflict staircase showed.

That the results of a conflict are often causes of new conflicts, so little issues can escalate into big fights.

Now, before the students leave, you want to get them thinking about conflict in their own life. You are going to ask them questions and have them answer them silently in their heads. Stress that these should not be answered out loud.

Read them the questions, allowing about 5 seconds in between for the students to think about them.

Silent Quiz Questions

a. Have you ever been in a fight?

b. Have you ever wanted to hit anyone?

c. Have you ever hit anyone?

d. Have you ever yelled at your parents or brothers or sisters?

e. Have you ever stopped a fight?

f. Have you ever seen a fight but not stopped it?

g. Did you want to stop it?

h. Have you ever been upset because of a fight?

i. Have you ever been hurt in a fight?

j. Have you ever regretted getting into a fight?

k. Have you ever felt pressured by your peers to fight?

Before you go:

Ask the classroom teacher how the lesson went and for suggestions for next week.
Tell the classroom teacher when you will be back next.

UNIT 2 – MISSING

Unit 3

Strategies for dealing with conflict

Goals: The students will…

· consider what is worth fighting for (the importance of the goal)

· realize the importance of how you fight when fighting – decide not to use violence

· understand the five strategies of conflict management

· discuss when to use each strategy

· practice using each strategy

Materials:

· handout: make double-sided copies for the class!!

· role-play scripts (see below): make sure that each teacher has a copy, and that each student who is acting can have a copy of his / her script

· conflict strategy signs for activity III – hypothetical situations

Preparation:

· get materials ready

· really learn & understand the five conflict strategies: what they mean & when to use each one

· review the handout & the role-plays

Method: The students will…

I. quickly review the definitions / difference between “conflict” and “fight” & the definition of escalator/de-escalator; decide what they would do in a hypothetical situation (on handout)

II. role-play the five conflict management strategies (before they know what they are called); discuss the role-plays, the importance of the goal or relationship à when to use each strategy à defining the strategies (learning what they are called)

III. review when to use each strategy with hypothetical situation game

IV. review when to use each strategy by returning to opening hypothetical-situation handout

I. Opening Activity: Hook Into Conflict Strategies: Review, handout

(estimated time, 5 min)

Goals: The students will…

· Review last week’s lesson

· Decide what to do about a conflict

o Review last lesson (quickly!) while passing out handouts [[unless you are ultra-prepared and already have the sheets on the desks, AS YOU SHOULD]],

“conflict” vs. “fight”
escalator / de-escalator (definitions)

o Handout: Students decide (choose from multiple-choice) what they would do in this situation. Front side only!

II. Five Ways of Resolving Conflict: Role-play and Discussion

(estimated time, 15 – 35 min)

Goals: The students will…

· define the five strategies of conflict management through role-play

· discuss and understand when & why to use each strategy

This activity includes scripted role-plays & discussion.

· introduce: “while you act in these or watch these role-plays, think about the different ways a conflict can be handled”

· remind students of role-play rules: always follow script; no physical contact…

· if your kids can handle individual, unsupervised group work, give them time to prepare / discuss skits, in pairs – if not, just choose students & have them read off sheet in front of class

· after each role-play:

· ask: “What just happened?” (have students quickly describe in their own words)

·        tell students the name of the conflict strategy they’ve just seen acted out… ask, what is its definition? (they should infer from what they’ve seen acted out)

1. withdrawing = forget about it, and forget about the other person
2. smoothing = let the other person have what he/she wants
3. forcing = don’t let the other person have what he/she wants                                            * be careful with this one! You may not be friends again… or the other    person might turn around & use it on you! *
4. compromising = neither person gets everything he/she wants.
5. problem-solving = together, both people think of a solution        that they both    want.

à might want to further discuss the difference between compromising & problem-solving: can anyone figure it out? Is one just a greater, more effortful level of another?

· write the name of the conflict strategy on the board

· discussion after all role-plays are complete

· Which was the best solution? Why? (à Matt / Mahdi really needed the basketball; they didn’t need to get into a big fight; they stayed friends…)

· à What was the goal? (à use the basketball) How important was it? (à very important because he had a game, he wanted to make the team… not so important b/c just a game…)

· à What was their relationship? (à friends, very good friends?) How important was it? (à pretty good friends)
What if they had been brother and sister? (à then they might have fought more but they would have to live w/ each other after that, they would have to deal with each other’s hard feelings)
What if they had been strangers? (à hard feelings wouldn’t get in the way of future relationships, they might have been more tactful / used another strategy)

· à How are the goal & relationship related in choosing a solution? (à determine which strategy is best)
Is one solution better for a very important goal? (à force / problem-solve)
One for a very important relationship? (à smooth / problem-solve)

· à seems problem-solving is always best? à we’ll learn about specifics of problem-solving (= negotiation) in a coming lesson

· Students should see chart on back of handout.

· Explain chart: The importance of the goal / relationship determines which strategy is best to use, when. Ask, “What questions do you have?”

III. What strategy, when? Assess learning: Hypothetical situation game
(estimated time, 10 – 20 min)

· Depending on your class, either:
Hand out signs – one for each conflict strategy – to small groups or individuals
OR
Write each conflict strategy on a different section of the chalkboard / hang up conflict strategy signs around the room (if your class can handle getting out of their seats & moving around)

· Explain the game: Students will…

o hear a hypothetical conflict situation

o choose an appropriate strategy (consider the importance of the relationship & the goal!! à see chart on handout!)

o either: lift up strategy sign OR walk to appropriate strategy spot designated in room

· Read situations – You may need to go over “what is the goal? / how important is the goal?” with the class as they are choosing.

o You and your best friend both need to read the same book by Friday. There is only one copy of the book at the library. What strategy do you use? (à compromise…)

o Your best friend shows your boyfriend or girlfriend a note you wrote about him/her. What strategy do you use? (may want to ask class: what is goal? à get your best friend to stop… ) (à problem-solve)

o The student next to you – a boy you don’t really know – looks at your work during a test and gets you into trouble. (à force?)

o Your mother makes you wash the dishes, which makes you late for the movies. (à withdraw, smooth)

o Even though there is no dress code, your parents won’t let you wear sneakers to school. Everyone else does. (à compromise)

o The student who sits behind you in class – a girl you don’t really know – distracts you by constantly tapping your chair and throwing paper wads at you. (à compromise – here the relationship is important because of proximity… like a war)

o A kid in the car next to you looks at you funny. (à withdraw / force)

o You trip over one of your really good friends’ feet in the hallway. You don’t know whether she put her foot there on purpose or not. (à smooth)

· If time, after each situation, have a couple students act out the resolution of the conflict according to their chosen strategy.

IV: Closing: Apply Strategies: Return to Worksheet, Discussion

(estimated time 10 min)

· If time, break into smaller groups.

· Have students turn to the backs of their sheets.

· Go over (ask students to explain) the chart (goal / relationship) & the meaning of each strategy

· Which option was which strategy?
(A = forcing, B = withdrawing, C = smoothing, D = compromising, E = problem solving)

· What is the goal here? (watching this movie) What is the relationship? (good friends) How important is the goal? (Do people disagree over the importance of goals? Is that okay? (yes, yes))

· à Which strategy would you choose?

· Is that strategy different from the one you originally chose? Why/ why not?

· What would be the result of each strategic solution? à Important to consider the results of these strategies!

· Act out solutions if time.

ROLE PLAYS – Unit 3
Depending on your class, you can choose whether to give them the title of the conflict style on their script or just to keep it for your own reference & announce it after they act out each skit.

*******************************ONE************************************

* *

Mahdi: Hey, that’s my basketball. I checked it out today.

Matt: Then why was it on the bench? I got it first. You can’t play basketball anyway. What do you want with a ball?

Mahdi: Okay, then… (walking away angrily) You never play fair! I had it first.

* *

**********************ONE = Mahdi is withdrawing**************************

******************************TWO***********************************

* *

Mahdi: Matt, don’t take that ball. I checked it out. I need it to practice.

Matt: Okay. I was just fooling around with it anyway. Let me know when you’re finished.

* *

************************TWO = Matt is smoothing**************************

*******************************THREE**********************************

* *

Mahdi: Hey, give me that basketball! I checked it out.

Matt: Too bad. I got it first.

Mahdi: Give it to me. (He grabs the ball.)

Matt: You’re such a jerk!

Mahdi: Thanks for the ball.

* *

***********************THREE = Mahdi is forcing**************************

******************************FOUR************************************

* *

Matt: I need this ball to practice foul shots.

Mahdi: I checked it out, and I need it too. Can we work something out?

Matt: (doesn’t respond, just keeps bouncing the ball)

Mahdi: Hey, I need that ball!

Matt: Well, I have a game tomorrow, so I need to practice. When do you need it?

Mahdi: Let me have it now, and I’ll be finished with it by 5:30.

Matt: I was hoping to have it right now, but I can live with that.

* *

**********************FOUR = They are compromising***********************

*******************************FIVE************************************

* *

Matt: I need this basketball for practice.

Mahdi: I checked it out, and I need it, too. You are always taking my things. Last week you borrowed my notebook and I failed the math test.

Matt: Can we work something out? I have a game tomorrow, and I need to practice foul shots?

Mahdi: I am trying out for the school team tomorrow. Could you find another basketball?

Matt: This game is really important. You don’t care as much about playing as I do.

Mahdi: Really, can’t you find another basketball?

Matt: I guess so, if there’s another one around here.

Mahdi: Actually, I saw one in the office. Let’s go see.

* *

*******************FIVE = They are problem solving*************************
STRATEGIES OF CONFLICT RESOLUTION / Yale University Peace by P.E.A.C.E.

You and Tevan usually have lots of fun together. One day, however, you have a conflict. You’re both at your friend Lashonda’s house. While you are outside, Tevan puts a movie into the VCR. You want to watch another movie. There is only one VCR. You want to watch your movie right now. So does Tevan. What can you do so you can watch your movie?

You grab your movie, take his out of the VCR, and say, “Let me watch my movie now or you’ll be sorry.”
Say, “I don’t want to watch my movie anymore and I don’t like you anymore either.” Forget about the dumb movie and give up on Tevan ever being your friend again.
Say, “You can watch your movie. I really didn’t want to watch mine.” Let Tevan watch the movie as long as he wants to keep you as a friend.
Say, “If you let me watch my movie I’ll let you have a turn at my computer later.” Make a deal.
Say, “Let’s figure out a way that we can watch both movies.” Figure out a way.

STRATEGIES OF CONFLICT RESOLUTION / Yale University Peace by P.E.A.C.E.

You grab your movie, take his out of the VCR, and say, “Let me watch my movie now or you’ll be sorry.”
Say, “I don’t want to watch my movie anymore and I don’t like you anymore either.” Forget about the dumb movie and give up on Tevan ever being your friend again.
Say, “You can watch your movie. I really didn’t want to watch mine.” Let Tevan watch the movie as long as he wants to keep you as a friend.
Say, “If you let me watch my movie I’ll let you have a turn at my computer later.” Make a deal.
Say, “Let’s figure out a way that we can watch both movies.” Figure out a way.

choosing a strategy. . .

(assess goal, relationship: less important / somewhat important / very important)

goal + relationship= SMOOTH: “your way”

goal + relationship = PROBLEM-SOLVE: “our way”

Goal + relationship = COMPROMISE: “some way”

goal + relationship = WITHDRAW: “no way”

goal + relationship = FORCE: “my way”

How important is this goal?_How important is this relationship?__

Which strategy should you use?

Which answer is which strategy?

UNIT 4 – MISSING

Unit 5a

Interpersonal Communication

Goals:

The students will…

· Be introduced to the importance of good communication skills inside resolving conflicts in their own lives, and demonstrate the practical application of those skills.

· Discover the importance of being a good listener, and practice good listening techniques

· Explore the different ways in which people communicate without necessarily speaking, and the impact this behavior can have in a conflict.

· Learn to recognize and modify what their own tone of voice or body language can communicate in a conflict, and recognize these meanings in other people’s behavior.

· Learn and practice “I-speak” as means of expressing their needs in a conflict in a positive and non-accusatory way.

· Realize that good communication is essential to getting what they want.

· Understand the necessity of good communication in averting misunderstandings.

· Begin to explore the importance of negotiation and the methods of successful negotiation.

The volunteers will…

· Practice their own communication skills with the students.

· Facilitate the accomplishment of the student goals

Materials

· Heart Surgery Role-play sheets

· Charades “feelings cards”

· Anita and Marie scenario (appendix)

· I-statements worksheets, enough copies for whole class (appendix)

Methods

I. Opening activity, engage the students: Counting to 10 OR Birthday Line

II. Discussion: What is communication?

III. Understanding what other people want: EARS: The components of good listening

IV. Practicing good listening: Heart surgery

V. Understanding body language: Feelings Charades

VI. Understanding tone of voice: Hey You!

VII. Expressing what you want: Learning how to communicate verbally: I-Speak

VIII. Closing Activity: Evaluation Questions (2-5 minutes)

Preparation

· Read through this lesson completely, including the role-plays in the appendix.

· Make enough copies of Heart Surgery Role-Play sheets for entire class (appendix).

· Make charades “feelings cards” out of notecards (appendix).

· Make enough copies of I-statements worksheets for entire class (appendix).

· Think about the importance of communication in a conflict.

· Familiarize yourself with the meaning of E.A.R.S.

· Think about what different types of body language and tone of voice tell us (review “feelings” sheet in appendix).

· Familiarize yourself with the procedure of “I-speak” and how to use it.

I. Opening Activity: Engage the Students: Counting to 10 OR Birthday Line

(Estimated time, 5 minutes)

· NOTE: Choose only ONE of the following games, based on which activity you think your class will respond the best to, based on your knowledge of their strong and weak points when playing games.

Volunteer leading this activity _________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity ______________________

A. Counting to 10

Activity Goals:

· Help kids focus and concentrate.

· Demonstrate the importance of listening and good communication.

This activity requires good concentration and group work on the part of the kids in order to count to 10 without 2 kids saying the same number at the same time.

· Break the class up into 2-3 smaller groups, with each volunteer leading one group.

· Each group needs to count to ten aloud but only one person can talk at one time. One person begins by saying "one" and then another student continues the counting with "two," until the group reaches "ten".

· This game is harder than it seems because often two members of the group will say the same number at the same time. Every time this happens, the group must start all over again from "one." They must successfully work together, using eye contact and caution, to reach "ten."

· If the group finishes early, feel free to have students do the activity again with a greater challenge, such as counting to 30, or counting to 10 with eyes closed.

B. Birthday line

Activity Goals:

· To help kids focus and concentrate.

· To explore ways of solving a problem as a group through communicating without talking.

This game demands that the students work together to solve a problem without talking at all. It is very important to emphasize that talking is not allowed, and that students must find alternate ways of communicating necessary information about when everyone’s birthdays are.

· Have all of the students get in a line in order of their birthdays. The trick is that the students cannot communicate verbally to accomplish the goal.

· You may help the students by telling them where the first person born in January and the last person born in December should stand, but make sure they do not talk!

II. Discussion: What is communication?

(Estimated time, 2-5 min)

Volunteer Leading Discussion __________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete discussion _______________________

Activity Goals:

· Discuss with students what communication is and why it is important.

· Connect communication to they game the students just played.

· Have kids come up with important points about communication themselves so that they begin to draw upon their existing assumptions of communication and are prepared to learn new things.

· Discover what the kids already know and think about communication.

Be a moderator in a discussion between the students, not a lecturer. If you feel that the students have skipped over an important issue bring up the topic in the form of a question you pose to the class.

It is also important to keep discussion brief and, while letting the students guide discussion to some extent, make sure you hit the main points and don’t go too far off-track.

· Introduce communication through what the kids just did in the game:

o What made the game hard? How did you overcome those challenges? (through communicating more effectively, concentrating, etc.)

o Have several kids explain their strategies in the game

o How did communication help you in this game?

o What are the different types of communication you used in this game?

§ Good listening (counting to 10)

§ Concentration (both games)

§ Body Language (Birthday line)

· Introduce the general topic of communication. Make sure to cover the following topics in this discussion, and throughout the lesson:

o What are different ways in which humans communicate with each other? Try to have kids come up with examples such as:

§ spoken language

§ writing

§ internet

§ touch, body language, eyes, voice inflection, et cetera

o How can good communication be helpful in solving problems in conflicts? Connect that to how you solved the problem in the game you just played

o Do you communicate differently with different types of people?

§ Father

§ Mother

§ brother

§ sister

§ friend

§ teacher

§ famous person

§ government

o If people communicate can they accomplish more? (example: why do scientists communicate. Share information, feelings, ideas à newer, better ideas)

o How can communication help you get what you want/help avoid a misunderstanding?

o What are some other ways to communicate besides talking?

§ writing letters to the government

§ over the radio

§ through artwork/theater/creative writing

o How can listening be an important part of communication? (transition into next activity)

III. Understanding what another person wants: E.A.R.S: The Components of Good listening

(Estimated time: 2 min.)

Volunteer leading this activity ________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _____________________

Activity Goals

o Provide an easy way of learning and remembering the components of good listening skills.

o Connect these skills to a procedure that relates to understanding someone else and working out your conflict with him/her.

EARS describes a step-by-step process of listening to someone else and responding in order to understand what that person wants and where he/she is coming from, which is essential not just in understanding the other person, but helping solve a conflict. Make sure the students understand this.

· Have a few students briefly brainstorm on why good listening is important in communicating with someone, and how it’s important in solving a conflict.

· Then brainstorm what you have to do to be a good listener. Try to

connect this to what students have just done in the game.

· As one volunteer gets suggestions, the other volunteer writes the following on the board:

Encourage

Ask

Restate

Summarize

· Explain how, in order to listen carefully to other people, we have to use our “ears.” The letters to EARS stand for the 4 components of being a good listener. Call on kids to try to define each word, but make sure you go over what each means in a way that makes sense to the class, using examples if necessary. Connect these examples to listening to someone else in a conflict and trying to solve the conflict. Use the following as guidelines:

1. ENCOURAGE: Encourage the other person to keep talking. Show that you are interested in what they are saying.

* Example: “Tell me more…”

2. ASK: Ask questions to get more information or to better understand what they want.

Examples: “why are your feelings hurt by this?” “What would you like to do instead?”

3. RESTATE: Restate, or say again in your own words, the basic ideas, including facts and feelings.

Example: “So you were upset that I told people about your brother’s problem…”

4. SUMMARIZE: Pull together the important ideas and feelings as both of you said them. Point out the things you have in common.

Example: “This seems to be what happened, and you’re feeling…is that right?”

IV. Practicing Good Listening: Heart Surgery

NOTE: should we use fewer patients so the game goes faster???

(Estimated time, 10 minutes)

Volunteer Leading This Activity_____________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity____________________

Activity Goals

· Have the kids practice applying EARS to an actual scenario where it is important that they listen carefully to each other.

· Use practical applications of EARS in solving a conflict as a group.

This game is more about students practicing their good listening skills and seeing

how they connect to solving a problem than solving the problem itself. If the committee of students is having a hard time making a decision, it is ok to simply stop the game after the allotted time is up

Distribute copies of the heart surgery handout to the whole class and have kids either read the instructions, and then take turns reading the 7 characters out loud, or read them silently for a few minutes. Make sure kids understand that their classmates will pretend they are responsible for deciding which character will receive a heart transplant.

Write the letters E.A.R.S. horizontally on the board with sufficient space under each one.

Ask for 4 volunteers to sit in front of the class, and explain that they will be working in a “committee” to decide which of these seven patients will receive a heart for transplantation. Each student on the “committee” must pick his/her first choice and then discuss it with the group.

· Explain to the committee that the only rule is that before each person speaks, they must encourage the person before them to clarify his/her view, ask questions about why he/she has that view, restate what that person has said, and summarize the main points.

· It is up to the class to point out each good listening strategy that the committee uses: Divide the class into 4 teams: the E team, A team, R team, and S team. Each holds up their respective letter when they think their strategy is being used by the committee. Each team gets a point each time its letter is checked off on the board.

· Discussion:

o What made you decide who to choose for the heart transplant?

o What made it hard to re-state what other people were saying? (did you often forget it if you weren’t listening carefully enough?)

o How did you help yourself remember what the person before you said?

o What kinds of questions helped you clarify what the person before you was saying?

o Did what people originally said get changed around when

o someone else re-stated it?

o How did good listening and communication help you make a

decision about the heart surgery?

- Helpful in figuring out what everybody wants

- Helpful in identifying ways to compromise

V. Understanding Body Language: Feelings Charades

(Estimated Time: 5 minutes)

Volunteer Leading this Activity ______________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity_______________

Goals of this activity:

· Demonstrate the importance of body language in communicating.

· Make kids aware of what body language they’re using when, what gestures go with what emotions, and what message it gives to people.

· Make kids aware of the meanings of similar body language in others.

· Discuss how body language can play a role in escalating/de-escalating conflicts.

· Prepare 3X5 cards with one of the emotion words from the appendix on each card.

· Have enough cards so a fair amount of students can participate, depending on time constraints.

· Ask volunteer students to select a card and silently act out the word they have chosen in front of the class while the remaining students guess what the emotion is. Do not let the volunteer say their word out loud before acting it out!!! Make sure students raise their hands to guess and do not yell words out. The volunteer must keep acting out the emotion until the class has guessed it.

· Depending on the classroom dynamic, the class can be split into 2 or 3 groups, with each group playing a separate game.

VI. Understanding Tone of Voice: Hey You!

(Estimated time: 5 minutes)

Volunteer Leading this Activity ______________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity_______________

Goals of this activity:

· Demonstrate the importance of tone of voice in communicating

· Make students aware of what tone of voice they’re using when, what tone goes with what emotions, and what message it gives to people.

· Make students aware of the meanings of similar tone of voice in others.

· Discuss how tone of voice can play a role in escalating/de-escalating conflicts.

This game is played the same way as charades, except students volunteer to

choose from the remaining emotion cards, and then take turns saying “hey you!”

to the class in a tone that suggests that emotion. The class guesses what the

emotion is.

· Brief discussion:

o How were you able to identify what emotions people were expressing through their body language and tone of voice?

o Were some more easy to identify than others? Why?

o Why is it important to be able to identify these emotions in someone’s body language or tone of voice when you’re in a conflict with him/her?

o What kinds of body language and tone of voice make it easiest to

communicate with someone else? Which are escalators in a

conflict? (dominating pose, glaring yelling, etc.) De-escalators? (smiling, looking the other person in the eye attentively, speaking slowly and softly)

VII. Expressing What You Want: Learning How to Communicate Verbally: I-speak

(Estimated time, 10 minutes)

Volunteer Leading This Activity_____________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity____________________

Activity Goals:

· Show how to communicate your needs in a conflict without escalating the conflict.

· Teach the difference between “i-speak” and “you-speak” and show how using I-speak is usually more appropriate in de-escalating a conflict.

· Show how I-speak is the most effective way of communicating what you want

· Demonstrate the format of I-speak

· Practice applying I-speak to practical problem-solving situations.

In this activity, it is important to continuously make I-speak appealing to the students by explaining how using it can help them get what they want from another person, or at least work out an agreement that both people are happy with.

· Tell the students you will now be dealing not with HOW you say something, but with WHAT you say. Also, instead of learning how to listen to others, we are dealing with making ourselves understood better by others.

· Then think of something to say to the class that you can phrase first in You-speak, then I-speak, to demonstrate the difference. Perhaps one teacher can say the first sentence and another teacher can interrupt and rephrase the same thing a different way. A suggestion could be:

“You guys never pay attention. You have to be quiet right

now.”

VERSUS:

“I feel discouraged by your lack of attention because I know

you’re capable of better behavior. I need you to be quiet so I can

continue teaching this lesson.”

Ask students which statement would most make them want to change their behavior, and make them the least angry with their teacher. Why?

· The you-statement accuses them and makes them want to respond with a counter-accusation.

· The I-statement explains why you want them to be quiet, and tells them they’re capable of doing better.

Have students brainstorm the difference between the “You-statement” and “I-statement” they just heard. You may want to make 2 columns on the board comparing the 2:

You- Statements

- accusatory

- negative

- focus only on what the other person has done wrong

- do not explain your reasons behind what

you’re asking them to do

- tend to escalate conflicts: make listener “fight

back” rather than work out the problem.

I-Statements

- More Positive

- Explain HOW you feel, WHY you feel that

way, and WHAT you want.

- Open up avenues for reaching an agreement and

solution and finding common ground (through each

person clearly explaining what they want).

· Make sure students understand why I-statements are more effective in communicating needs, and discuss the merits of using them instead of you-statements in resolving conflict.

Go over the basic format of phrasing things in I-speak (write on board):

I feel (state your emotion)

when (describe the specific situation in a neutral and objective way)

because (state the effect on your life)

and I want (state the action you want taken).

· Tell students they will now look at a conflict scenario and try to compare the use of I-statements and You-statements.

o Ask volunteers to role-play what is on the handout of Anita and Marie activity (Appendix). Ask the questions on the procedure sheet, discussing the difference between the conflict phrased in I-statements and You-statements.

· Give out worksheets to each student and tell them they will spend most of the rest of the class practicing changing You-statements to I-statements. Depending on the class, the kids can either do this individually at their seats, or out loud as a class.

o Clearly go over the instructions at the top of the sheet and make sure the students understand what to do BEFORE they begin.

o If the students are doing the sheets individually, go around to each desk and make sure they are not having too much trouble.

o Depending on the class, either collect the sheets, or go over the answers as a class.

VIII. Closing Activity: Evaluation Questions

(Estimated Time: 2-5 minutes)

Volunteer Leading This Activity_____________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity____________________

Activity Goals:

· To review the skills and concepts discussed in the lesson

· To introduce some of the themes that will come up in the next lesson.

Incorporate Questions such as:

o What were some of the aspects of communication you learned and how will they help you work out problems/de-escalate conflicts?

o How does I-Speak relate to EARS? How can you use both to solve a conflict (EARS helps you listen to the other person’s point of view, I-speak helps you express your own)

o What is negotiation and how does it relate to communication? (negotiation is what you’ve just practiced, with EARS and I-speak: learning to state your points of view and figure out what the problems and solutions are).

o How can you apply the skills you’ve learned to other areas besides your personal conflicts? (i.e., solving a problem in your community, writing to the government, etc.)

BEFORE YOU GO:

· Tell the class when you will be coming next

· Talk with the classroom teacher about how the lesson went.

· Write notes for yourselves on how the different activities went.

Unit 5b: Communication within the Community

Goals:

The students will…

· Learn how to practice effective communication when there are cultural barriers, and practice dealing with possible barriers (i.e., cultural, racial, ethical) to communication.

· Explore how different communities can break down these barriers through communication.

· Make connections between their classroom activities and the difficulties that members of different communities/countries/cultures have communicating with one another in the real world.

· Learn the importance of communicating with members of another culture to understand the cultural forces shaping their behavior, where the points of difference are, and how to deal with these differences in a conflict.

· Learn the importance of compromise, and how to reach it through good communication.

· Explore how to reach agreement or common ground without having to compromise core values or cultural practices.

· Students will apply their community skills to their own community/real life through writing a letter to the mayor expressing the needs of their community.

· Develop their written communication skills through letter-writing.

The Volunteers Will…

· Discover how students handle cultural barriers.

· Learn about the issues students face in their communities

· Facilitate the accomplishment of student goals.

Materials

· Red things and blue things for Suuls vs. Ichtholonians

· Instruction sheets for Suuls vs. Ichtholonians: “Suuls” instructions for half the class, “Ichthalonians” for other half.

· Lined paper for letter-writing

· Peace by PEACE word finds (copies for whole class)

Methods

I. Opening Activity, Review, Engage the Students, Introduce Themes of the Lesson: Alien Shoe Tie (5-10 min)

II. Recognizing and overcoming cultural differences: Suuls vs Ichthalonians (10-15 min)

III. Expressing community needs: Letter to the mayor (20 min)

IV. Extra closing activity: Word Find (If time permits)

Preparation

· Read over the lesson carefully

· Photocopy enough “suuls” instructions cards for half the class, and enough “ichthalonians” for the other half.

· Prepare red things for half the class, and blue things for the other half (paper clips, pieces of paper, DO NOT USE CANDY!!)

· Photocopy article from appendix to distribute to entire class.

· Find extra paper to bring in for letter-writing activity.

· Think about cultural barriers to communication and how to overcome them.

I. Opener, Review of last week, Engage the Students, Introduce themes of lesson: Alien Shoe tie

(Estimated time, 5-10 minutes)

Volunteer Leading this Activity________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity____________________

Goals of this activity:

· Have students use good communication skills to work together towards a common goal.

· Provide a segue into how to communicate with someone from a different culture

· Have your students sit together in a large group.

· Present the game as follows:

o One of the teachers is introduced as an alien visiting from Mars. She or he understands English, but has a very limited understanding of what the words mean. She or he also has no idea what a shoe is or what it does.

o The alien is easily bored, so she or he needs to hear a different voice with every suggestion. The alien is also only able to listen to one person at a time.

o The object of the game is to get the alien to put on her shoe and tie it.

o The alien will take all instructions quite literally. (If for example, you tell the alien to pull out the tongue of the shoe, s/he will pull out his/her tongue and wiggle it over his or her shoe.)

o The whole class must decide on what to tell the alien and only one person may speak at a time.

· Play the game, with one of the PXP teachers playing the alien, and the class telling it what to do.

· After the students play the game, use the following questions to guide the group in a discussion of the game:

o How did you get the alien to put on his/her shoe?

o Were they any difficulties that arose while communicating to the alien and to each other? How did you overcome those obstacles?

o What happened when the alien didn’t understand you?

o Was it difficult to re-word your instructions?

o Give examples of how you had to paraphrase an instruction.

o Are there times when you have difficulty explaining something to others? Why?

o How do you overcome those communication obstacles?

· Review some of the topics of communication covered in 5a, including

o What is communication and why is it important?

o What is communication’s role in solving conflict?

o What specific methods of communication did we learn last week?

o How do we figure out what someone else wants in a conflict, and discuss what we want?

o Remind students of discussion begun at the end of 5a on communication’s importance in the community and larger world to address important issues.

o Brainstorm what kinds of things might get in the way of communication between people who are different/come from different cultures and communities.

II. Recognizing and Overcoming Cultural Barriers to Communication: Suuls vs. Ichthalonians

(Estimated time, 10-15 minutes)

Activity Goals:

· To simulate a real-life situation where kids are forced to overcome cultural differences in order to achieve a common goal (trading).

· To show how people from a different culture might approach the same problem from a completely different perspective.

· To show how it might be possible to reach a compromise without sacrificing elements of your culture, if you can find a way to communicate with another person so they understand where you’re coming from.

· To show how it is possible to compromise on some issues but not others, and explore what can and cannot be compromised.

In this game, students have to trade “red things” for “blue things.” The problem is that the students with the red things and the students with the blue things each come from different cultures, and they have different social rules they have to follow. The students have to find a way to overcome their differences and communicate in spite of them.

Before the game begins, explain to the class that this game will involve playing the roles of people trading with each other. Remind students of some important general rules to follow when trading, such as

o NO PHYSICAL CONTACT! (other than attempted handshakes)

o Snatching the red and blue things without being given them by consent is not allowed!

o Keep voices down and behavior calm and focused.

o No running.

Give half the students red things and half blue things, and the corresponding sheet reminding them which rules to follow. Explain to each group (so the other can’t hear) what their rules of trading are. Make sure the students are totally clear on how the game works and what roles to play BEFORE beginning the trading!

For more information, see the detailed instruction sheets (attached).

After the game is played, discuss the following questions:

o Were you successful at trading?

o Were you frustrated by the other person’s culture?

o How did you overcome this frustration?

o Did you keep an open mind and attempt to respect the other culture to make the trade?

o How did you get around your cultural prejudices if you did trade?

o Did you learn about the other culture in the process or did you simply trade?

o What elements of your culture could you compromise? What could you not compromise?

o How is this exercise related to real life?

o Do you ever come into contact with people with different customs than your own? How do you overcome those differences?

When leading this discussion, stress how it’s important to understand that

someone from another culture might be coming with different perspectives.

Make sure to stress how you don’t have to get people to change things about their

culture, just EXPLAIN/COMMUNICATE where you’re coming from, so maybe

then you can compromise.

III. Expressing Community Needs: Letter to Mayor

(Estimated time, 20 minutes)

Volunteer Leading this activity_________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity____________________

Goals for this Activity:

· Give students experience with written communication (letter-writing) as a form of expression.

· Encourage students to think critically about what they would like to see changed in their school/neighborhood/community/city, and how they might articulate their thoughts in a letter to the mayor.

· Give the students a sense of empowerment: they are capable of changing things in their lives!

Sum up lesson before letter-writing by asking such questions as:

o How have we been using verbal and non-verbal communication so far to overcome cultural differences?

o What kinds of issues have we tried to solve? How have we used communication to solve it?

Distribute and read out loud an article about someone who used written

communication to make change happen (appendix):

http://www.justgive.org/html/kidscorner/melissapoe.html

Tell students that they will play a similar role by writing a letter to the mayor telling

him what they want changed in New Haven:

· If you don't think you want anything changed then tell him what you like about New Haven.

· You will be using your communication skills to get real world issues addressed

· Remind the class that the mayor might have a different perspective, coming from different place, and they need to explain where they’re coming from and WHY they want what you want

· Explain that the letter will be published, so it has to be completed and collected in each class.

Ask your classroom teacher to collect the letters when they are completed. Please

remember to pick up these letters when you return to your classroom the next week

because we do send these letters to the mayor.

V. Closing activity (if letter-writing permits time): Word Find

If an individual student finishes the letter early, give him/her a word find sheet to do in the remainder of class time.

BEFORE YOU GO:

· Tell the class when you will be visiting next.

· Discuss with the teacher how your group handled the students and ask for his or her critique.

Body Language Charades and Hey You!: Emotion Cards

Instructions: Prepare 3 X 5 cards with one of the following words on each card, to distribute to volunteers in the class.

Afraid Lonely

Angry loving

Anxious listening carefully

Ashamed

Attentive mean

misunderstood

Bashful Nervous

Betrayed not paying attention

Bewildered

Bored Peaceful

Brave playful

proud

Calm

Concerned scared
confident shy

Confused silly

strong

Defensive surprised

Delighted

Depressed tense

Discouraged trapped

Disappointed

uncertain

Embarrassed ucomfortable

Encouraging upset

Envious

Excited worried

Fearful

Foolish

friendly

frustrated

glad

guilty

hopeful

humiliated

hurt

important

intense

irritated

jealous

I-Statements Worksheet

Directions: Time to work on getting what you want! For each situation below, fill in the blanks to write the I-statement you would use to explain to the other person how you feel.

The student next to you looks at your work during a test and gets you in trouble.

I feel _____________________________________________________________

When_____________________________________________________________

Because___________________________________________________________

And I want_________________________________________________________

Your mother won’t let you go to the party Friday night. Everyone else is going.

I feel _____________________________________________________________

When_____________________________________________________________

Because___________________________________________________________

And I want_________________________________________________________

You lent your new bike to a friend. When he/she returns it, it has a flat tire.

I feel _____________________________________________________________

When_____________________________________________________________

Because___________________________________________________________

And I want_________________________________________________________

Someone in one of your classes is showing interest in your boyfriend or girlfriend. You don’t like it.

I feel _____________________________________________________________

When_____________________________________________________________

Because___________________________________________________________

And I want_________________________________________________________

Your teacher gave you a bad grade on an English paper. You worked really hard on the paper and don’t understand why she gave you a D.

I feel _____________________________________________________________

When_____________________________________________________________

Because___________________________________________________________

And I want_________________________________________________________

A friend is pressuring you to try marijuana. You have decided that you don’t want to get started using drugs.

I feel _____________________________________________________________

When_____________________________________________________________

Because___________________________________________________________

And I want_________________________________________________________

“I Did it:” The Steps to Being a Good Mediator

Introduce yourself and explain that you will help solve the problem.

Define ground rules: explain guidelines for how disputants should behave.

Information from the disputants: have them tell their sides of the story

Definite and clarify the main problem based on these stories: ask questions to clarify, summarize everything that was said.

Ideas: brainstorm fair solutions to the problem.

Test/Think about the solution: will it work? Is it realistic?

If all these steps are followed and a good solution is reached, you may want to write a formal agreement between the 2 disputants explaining how they will solve their problem. Then, have them sign the agreement.

Heart Surgery Committee

You are surgeons at a big hospital. Your committee must make a very important decision. Seven patients need a heart transplant. There is only one heart donor at this time. All patients could receive the heart. Which patient would you choose to receive the heart? Why? Your committee must agree on the choice.

PATIENTS: 1. A famous brain surgeon at the height of her career. Single,

black woman. No children. She is 31 years old.

2. A 12 year old musician. Japanese girl.

3. A 40-year old teacher. Hispanic male, 2 children.

4. A 15-year-old pregnant woman. Unmarried, white, no other children.

5. A 35-year-old Roman Catholic priest.

6. A 17-year-old waitress. White, high school dropout. Helps her family with her earnings.

7. A 38 year old scientist working on a cure for AIDS. Chinese woman, no children, lesbian.

Unit 6

Overcoming Stereotypes

Goals:

The students will…

Feel ethnic pride.
Define the word “stereotype”.
Become aware of the assumptions we make about other people without realizing it, in order to keep from doing it in the future.
Realize that stereotyping is hurtful.
Realize that some generalizations can be good and helpful but that successful people realize the sterotypes they have and don’t let them apply in every situation.
Learn how to overcome stereotypes by communicating: getting to know the other person by talking about what makes you different (point about spiders, below).Realize that sometimes people who are labeled start to act like that label
Understand the relationship between stereotypes and conflict.
Learn that to communicate well, a person need to overcome their pre-assumptions.
Discuss that prejudice is “pre-judge”.
Discuss the relationship between stereotypes and prejudice and racism, realizing that prejudice and racism is how stereotypes can be implemented in a bad way.

Materials:

Cards for the Stereotypin’ Game.
Copies of the Bob Dylan Song, “Hurricane.”

Methods:

I. Opening Activity: False Assumptions: Doctor Riddle

II. Celebrate Difference and Define Stereotypes: Stand Up/Sit Down Game

III. Get Stereotyped: The Stereotypin’ Game

IV. Stereotypes Don’t Apply to Everyone: Stand-up Game

V. Racism Discussion/Racism is Everyone’s Problem: The Hurricane

VI. Closing Activity: Summary

Preparation:

One week in advance: Get permission from classroom teacher to have racism discussion.
Make Stereotypin’ cards.
Learn the difference between a stereotype, a generalization, and a prejudice.

I. Opening Activity: False Assumptions: Doctor Riddle

(estimated time, 3 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Show that we tend to make assumptions about people that aren’t always true.

Begin the lesson by telling the students this riddle:

A man and his son are driving along and get into a bad car accident. The ambulance shows up and takes them both to the hospital. The son is rushed into surgery. The doctor who will perform the surgery enters the operating room, but as soon as the doctor sees the patient, the doctor says, “I can’t operate on this boy.” Why can’t the doctor operate on the boy?

The answer: The doctor is the boy’s mother.

Tell the students: Since many people can’t figure out why the doctor can’t operate, they are making an assumption – without even realizing it – that the doctor is male. But really, half of all doctors now are female. We’ll be talking about making assumptions today. First, we’re going to talk a little about difference.

II. Celebrate Difference: Stand Up/Sit Down Game

(estimated time, 10 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Celebrate individual difference.
Define “stereotype.”

Tell the students that you will read a series of statements aloud. Ask the students to stand up if they think a particular statement applies to them. After reading each statement, give the students a few minutes to reflect before taking their seats. Feel free to participate in the activity yourself.

Statements to be read out loud:

Stand up if you…

Take the bus to school.
Have more than three brothers and sisters.
Are left-handed.
Speak a language other than English.
Like N’Sync.
Were born outside of New Haven.
Regularly go to religious services (church, temple, etc).
Have flown on a plane.
Play a musical instrument.

Follow this game with a discussion:

What did you notice about your classmates during this game?

That everyone is different.

What are some ways that people are different?

Examples from the game, plus where they live, skin color, their jobs, etc.

Is there anything that is necessarily bad about any of these differences?
What can be good about people being different?

Tell the students that you want to talk about a word that relates to difference: Stereotype.

Ask the students to come up with a definition of the word “stereotype”.

No, not a type of radio!
A stereotype is an oversimplified image of a person: it’s a category that we put people in based on one, two, or a few obvious characteristics when we don’t know the person.
For example, if all the people who took the bus to school were considered stupid just because they took the bus to school, that would be a stereotype. Obviously, this would be untrue – so are many stereotypes.

What is an example of a stereotype?

Yale students are rich. Girls care about clothes and boys care about sports. Women are bad drivers. White people can’t dance. Black people are good at basketball.

Tell the students that you’re going to play a game to see what it’s like to be stereotyped.

III. Get Stereotyped: The Stereotypin’ Game

(estimated time, 15 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Stereotype students in a safe environment.
Show that being stereotyped against is hurtful.
Show that students start to act like the label they’ve been given.

Tell the students that you need four volunteers to attend an imaginary party. You will tape a card to the volunteers’ foreheads so they can’t see it, then the rest of the class will treat the volunteers according to the stereotype attached to their heads. The volunteers will have to guess how they have been labeled.

The stereotype cards should read:

Football Player
Nerd/Teacher’s Pet
Cheerleader
Popular Kid

Choose students who DO NOT match the stereotypes. For example, choose the most macho boy with his hand raised for the cheerleader role. No student should actually be stereotyped against.

Set up ground rules: no insulting, no physical contact, people who do not have a stereotype card should stay in their seats.

Have each student enter the “party” one at a time. The rest of the students should treat the party-goer according to the stereotype on his/her forehead.

After each student figures out what is taped to their head, ask them how it felt to be stereotyped against. Is it fun? Is it fair?

Because this is a game, sometimes students will say that it didn’t bother them to be stereotyped against. You may need to prod, “But when you were up here and everyone was laughing at you and you didn’t know why and really, it wasn’t even true… how did that make you feel? How would it make you feel if this were real life?”

Try to point out an example of how someone being stereotyped against in this game started to act like that stereotype said they should. Ask for some other examples of how this happens in real life.

For example, if everyone thinks students who get good grades are nerds and like to be alone, then a student who gets good grades might start to hang out alone because everyone says that’s what they do.

Finish the discussion with:

Are stereotypes always negative?

No. For example, there is a common stereotype that Asian people are good at math.

So is it ok to have positive stereotypes?

Even though it is a positive stereotype, it is still not always true, and can also be hurtful.

How can a positive stereotype be hurtful?

If an Asian person is limited to what they’re supposed to be good at by their stereotypes, then that’s hurtful. For example, an Asian artist could have a hard time finding a job painting because people might think their talent is math, not art.

What does a stereotype have to do with conflict?

People can get into conflicts because they stereotype, stereotypes limit communication and that makes conflicts worse.

Where do stereotypes come from?

Television, news, family, etc.

Why do you think people say or think these things about other people?

Tell your students that before you go on, you want to come up with another definition.

What’s the difference between a generalization and a stereotype?

A generalization is when you assume that the characteristics of one person apply to all the people that that person is in a group with. For example, if one Italian person likes pizza, a generalization would be that all Italian people like pizza.

Are generalizations ever helpful? Why do we have them?

Yes. For example, if you’re in a foreign country, it would be useful to assume that a stranger you meet will probably follow the country’s customs, so you can behave appropriately. (Remember the Communication lesson’s Sulls and Icthalonians Game).

Why are generalizations hurtful?

Stereotypes often form from generalizations: a generalization is when you make an assumption about many based on one, and a stereotype is when you make an assumption about one based on what you think is a characteristic of many.

If a stereotype is based on what you think is a characteristic of many, are stereotypes always true?

Tell the students that you’re going to try to answer this question with the next game.

IV. Stereotypes Don’t Apply to Everyone: Stand-up Game

(estimated time, 15 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Show that stereotypes are not always true.

To decide if stereotypes are always true or not, ask the students to brainstorm some stereotypes of girls and boys (and any other relevant categories that apply to many people in the room). Write them on the board. Some examples are:

Girls

Don’t play sports.
Don’t want to have a career, just want a family.
Are bad at math.
Played with dolls/Didn’t play with trucks as a little kid.
Care a lot about clothes and make-up.
Like to dance.

Boys

Play sports.
Don’t care about how they look.
Swear a lot.
Played with trucks/Didn’t play with dolls as a little kid.
Hate to dance.
Don’t shower as much as girls.

People who wear glasses

Care more about doing homework than anything else.
Don’t have any friends.
Aren’t cool.
Don’t play sports.
Get good grades.
Are smart.

Once you have a decent list, ask students to stand up when you say something that applies to them. The common stereotypes don’t apply to all the students who are standing. For example,

All girls who play sports stand up.
All boys who shower every day stand up.
All people who wear glasses who have friends stand up.

Continue having groups of students stand until every student is standing.

Discussion:

Ask the students what this means in terms of stereotypes. Are stereotypes always true?

Most people don’t fit into stereotypes. If everyone or almost everyone in this class does not fit into a stereotype that they’re labeled as, then most people probably don’t fit neatly into stereotypes.

What’s a way to get rid of stereotypes?

If you get to know someone, you’ll find out that they don’t fit into stereotypes.
For example, if someone is afraid of spiders, they never go near the spiders and so they never realize that spiders aren’t so scary after all. A way to end stereotypes is to get to know someone that you stereotype – you will realize that there is much more to them than the stereotype, and once you get to know them, they won’t be so scary.

What can the people who get stereotyped do to get rid of those stereotypes?

Show people that the stereotypes aren’t true.

What happens when people don’t get rid of stereotypes, for example, based on skin color?

Racism

V. Discussion of Racism

(estimated time, 25 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Discuss racism.
Consider prejudice as “pre-judge”.
Show that racism is everyone’s problem.
Show that even young people can have a big impact on racism.

**Racism is a very delicate subject. One week in advance of teaching this lesson, you should get permission from the classroom teacher to have this discussion. Also, under no circumstances should you bring up or discuss racial slurs.**

Feel free to deviate from this discussion outline. Some key points to get across are:

Looking at the color of someone’s skin and making judgments about them before you know anything else about them is stereotyping. You are pre-judging them. This is prejudice.
Racism is when you stereotype based on race (when you are prejudiced) and also think that one race is superior.
Racism is not fair because the negative stereotypes don’t apply to everyone.
Sometimes people start to act like what they have been labeled as.

Although the discussion has worked well in the past, if you are not comfortable with it or if you would otherwise prefer to do so, you can do The Hurricane activity instead. Or, you can combine both. What actually gets discussed will depend a great deal on what the students want to talk about, but it helps to have an idea of how you can shape the discussions.

Discussion outline (25 minutes):

Ask the students what racism has to do with stereotyping.

Looking at the color of someone’s skin and making judgments about them before you know anything else about them is stereotyping. You are pre-judging them. This is prejudice.
Racism is when you stereotype based on race(are prejudiced) and also think that one race is superior.

Ask the students for some personal examples of racism that they have encountered.

Some examples they might give are: siblings getting pulled over while driving because they are black, a salesman refusing to sell them something because of their race, examples from the 1960’s civil rights movements, etc.

Some students in the past have reported that when they go into a store, they are followed by the salesmen, who thinks they are going to steal something just because they are black or because they are a teenager. Ask the students:

Is this fair?
Is this true?
Who here would not steal something even if they could get away with it?

If these teenagers/black students wouldn’t steal, then maybe the stereotype isn’t true.
Some students will probably admit that they would steal if they had the opportunity. Make the point that sometimes people start to act like the stereotypes they’ve been labeled as. Ask the students how this applies to racism.

Discuss what students can do to end racism. Whose job is it to end racism, or to undo what racism has done?

Among other things, discuss the spider example again (see above).
Possibly discuss The Hurricane (below).

Racism is everyone’s problem: The Hurricane (25 minutes)

Briefly tell the students what happened:

Rubin “Hurricane” Carter, a boxer, dreamed of being the middleweight champion. He was arrested for the murder of three people in a New Jersey bar, and although he was clearly innocent, he was sentenced to three life sentences. He wrote an autobiography while in jail, The Sixteenth Round, and his case attracted national attention by people like Muhammed Ali and Bob Dylan.

Hand out the lyrics of the Bob Dylan song, “The Hurricane”. If available, play the song for the students and have them read along. Discuss what information they can find from the song. Make sure to ask the students:

How was racism involved in The Hurricane case?
What does racism have to do with stereotyping?

Looking at the color of someone’s skin and making judgments about them before you know anything else about them is stereotyping. You are pre-judging them. This is prejudice.
Racism is when you stereotype based on race(are prejudiced) and also think that one race is superior.

Whose job is it to end racism, or to undo what racism has done?

After the students discuss whose job it is to end racism, tell them the rest of The Hurricane’s story:

Years after The Hurricane’s book came out, an alienated American boy read the autobiography and found meaning for the first time in his life. The boy was convinced of Carter’s innocence and enlisted the help of his guardians, who happened to be social activists, to free the boxer. Carter said, “Hate put me in prison, love is gonna bust me out.” Carter and the boy were successful, and twenty years after he had been wrongly imprisoned, The Hurricane eventually walked free.

Ask the students if this changes what they think about whose problem racism is. Ask them what they think about the comment, “Hate put me in prison, love is gonna bust me out.”

Point out that very famous adults like Muhammed Ali and Bob Dylan tried to get The Hurricane out of prison, but that it was a young, troubled kid who was finally successful.

VI. Closing Activity: Summary

(estimated time, 5 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Review what we have learned.

Have the students summarize what they have learned:

Definition of stereotype, generalization, pre-judge, racism.
Why difference is good.
That stereotypes don’t apply to everyone and aren’t always true.
Why stereotyping is hurtful.
Why racism is everyone’s problem.

MATERIALS:

The Hurricane, by Bob Dylan

Pistol shots ring out in the barroom night

Enter Patty Valentine from the upper hall.

She sees the bartender in a pool of blood,

Cries out, "My God, they killed them all!"

Here comes the story of the Hurricane,

The man the authorities came to blame

For somethin' that he never done.

Put in a prison cell, but one time he could-a been

The champion of the world.

Three bodies lyin' there does Patty see

And another man named Bello, movin' around mysteriously.

"I didn't do it," he says, and he throws up his hands

"I was only robbin' the register, I hope you understand.

I saw them leavin'," he says, and he stops

"One of us had better call up the cops."

And so Patty calls the cops

And they arrive on the scene with their red lights flashin'

In the hot New Jersey night.

Meanwhile, far away in another part of town

Rubin Carter and a couple of friends are drivin' around.

Number one contender for the middleweight crown

Had no idea what kinda sh** was about to go down

When a cop pulled him over to the side of the road

Just like the time before and the time before that.

In Paterson that's just the way things go.

If you're black you might as well not show up on the street

'Less you wanna draw the heat.

Alfred Bello had a partner and he had a rap for the cops.

Him and Arthur Dexter Bradley were just out prowlin' around

He said, "I saw two men runnin' out, they looked like middleweights

They jumped into a white car with out-of-state plates."

And Miss Patty Valentine just nodded her head.

Cop said, "Wait a minute, boys, this one's not dead"

So they took him to the infirmary

And though this man could hardly see

They told him that he could identify the guilty men.

Four in the mornin' and they haul Rubin in,

Take him to the hospital and they bring him upstairs.

The wounded man looks up through his one dyin' eye

Says, "Wha'd you bring him in here for? He ain't the guy!"

Yes, here's the story of the Hurricane,

The man the authorities came to blame

For somethin' that he never done.

Put in a prison cell, but one time he could-a been

The champion of the world.

Four months later, the ghettos are in flame,

Rubin's in South America, fightin' for his name

While Arthur Dexter Bradley's still in the robbery game

And the cops are puttin' the screws to him, lookin' for somebody to blame.

"Remember that murder that happened in a bar?"

"Remember you said you saw the getaway car?"

"You think you'd like to play ball with the law?"

"Think it might-a been that fighter that you saw runnin' that night?"

"Don't forget that you are white."

Arthur Dexter Bradley said, "I'm really not sure."

Cops said, "A poor boy like you could use a break

We got you for the motel job and we're talkin' to your friend Bello

Now you don't wanta have to go back to jail, be a nice fellow.

You'll be doin' society a favor.

That sonofa***** is brave and gettin' braver.

We want to put his a** in stir

We want to pin this triple murder on him

He ain't no Gentleman Jim."

Rubin could take a man out with just one punch

But he never did like to talk about it all that much.

It's my work, he'd say, and I do it for pay

And when it's over I'd just as soon go on my way

Up to some paradise

Where the trout streams flow and the air is nice

And ride a horse along a trail.

But then they took him to the jail house

Where they try to turn a man into a mouse.

All of Rubin's cards were marked in advance

The trial was a pig-circus, he never had a chance.

The judge made Rubin's witnesses drunkards from the slums

To the white folks who watched he was a revolutionary bum

And to the black folks he was just a crazy nigger.

No one doubted that he pulled the trigger.

And though they could not produce the gun,

The D.A. said he was the one who did the deed

And the all-white jury agreed.

Rubin Carter was falsely tried.

The crime was murder "one," guess who testified?

Bello and Bradley and they both baldly lied

And the newspapers, they all went along for the ride.

How can the life of such a man

Be in the palm of some fool's hand?

To see him obviously framed

Couldn't help but make me feel ashamed to live in a land

Where justice is a game.

Now all the criminals in their coats and their ties

Are free to drink martinis and watch the sun rise

While Rubin sits like Buddha in a ten-foot cell

An innocent man in a living hell.

That's the story of the Hurricane,

But it won't be over till they clear his name

And give him back the time he's done.

Put in a prison cell, but one time he could-a been

The champion of the world.

Unit 7 Perspectives: Empathy/Point of View

GOALS

- Showing that solving conflicts isn’t about placing blame. Often you have to accept

that there is no one right answer and then find a solution that benefits everyone.

- If you only listen to one person’s point of view, you might get the wrong story; you

- have to listen to everyone to figure out what happened.

- You should try to see the point of view of the person with whom you are in a

conflict.

- Don’t assume someone did something just because they have done it in the past.

- Understanding the concept of empathy

- Personal goal for your classroom for today: _______________________________

MATERIALS

- Optical illusion worksheets for every 1 or 2 students

- Copies of the Curfew Conflict and Room 619 stories for every 1 or 2 students

PREPARATION

- Review the optical illusions and prepare your transition from illusions to different

perspectives.

- Copy the Curfew Conflict sheets and cut them out so that each student has one.

- Cut out parts of the Room 619 story to give to the students to act out/read aloud.

METHOD

I. Opener: Students will practice seeing an image from two different points of view to

teach them the concept of empathy in conflict situations.

II. What happened in room 619?: Students will apply perspective practice to a situation

where they have limited information in order to explore many possible answers

within a single situation.

III. Curfew Conflict: Students will practice "conflicts" in which they have to understand

the other person's point of view in order to make a solution.

LESSON

I. Opener: Optical illusions (10 min)

- Leading into discussion of different ways of looking at the same thing.

- Be sure to explain how the optical illusions exercise can relate to real life conflict

situations in which 2 people can view a single situation entirely differently.

II. What happened in room 619? (20 min)

o Make sure entire class gets the sheets with all the characters. Have each character's

point of view read aloud by a different student.

· What to emphasize in the game: not about who did it/who’s lying, but that you can’t

really tell what happened

o To explain Meg’s side, suggest that Jason showed her the design

· To explain Jason's, say that Jason might have thought a plane coming from middle of

the room was back of room.

o Ask them what kind of solution could make sense of all the different perspectives.

Maybe the kids were using the airplanes to solve the math problem?

Remember that there could be some missing information.

· Discussion: Have you ever been blamed for something based on things you may have

done in the past?

· Come up with a solution that benefits whole class. Keep in mind that maybe you

can’t know who did it, and that not everyone may be telling the whole truth.

Don’t accuse one person, but find a solution that benefits everyone.

III. Curfew Conflict (20 mins max): Putting yourself in others’ shoes

a. Have the students brainstorm other ways perspectives in a community/classroom

setting are important in a conflict. Let them come up with examples they have

witnessed and things that have happened to them.

b. Then transition into examples of personal conflict with another person having a

different perspective.

c. Define empathy as being understanding of another's situation, feelings, and motives.

d. Divide the class into A's and B's. Give one group the Parent role and the other group

the Tom role. Have A's and B's decide on which points they are unwilling to

compromise (ex. For Parent, insist that Tom must be safe).

e. Assign each student one of the points in the role play, or 2 students per point if

necessary.

f. A's on one side of the room, B's on the other (or in desks on 2 sides of room).

g. Each kid has to express his view (using I-language) to a partner in the other group.

h. As they reach compromise, they move into common ground (middle between 2

groups). The purpose is to get entire class into the common ground area.

IV. Closing (2-5 min.)

a. How does having different points of view help you in life? (conflict is not always bad).

b. How does it get in the way? (when you’re unwilling to compromise/have empathy)

___ Did you tell your classroom teacher when you are returning?

___ Did you ask your classroom teacher for feedback?

(Curfew Conflict materials on page 3, ready to be copied and cut out)

THE CURFEW CONFLICT

PARENT

Tom wants to stay out late and hang around with his friends. You say, "No." This has created a great deal of tension in the house and communication between you and Tom is difficult. You are worried that Tom will get into trouble, which you know can happen even to a good kid who doesn't mean to get into trouble. You also worry about his safety

and feel that it is your responsibility as a parent to know where he is. Tom has good grades, and you want them to stay that way. You do trust Tom, but you don't know all his friends and are not sure you trust them. You are not happy with the tension in the house and wish you and Tom were talking things out.

TOM

You want to stay out late and hang around with your friends without having to tell your parent where you're going . But your parent says, "No." You have good grades, and you would continue to keep them up. You would also keep up with your job around the house. You feel you've proven that you can be trusted, and you feel your friends can be trusted. You know how to say "no" to something foolish or dangerous. You don't

understand why you aren't being allowed this freedom when other kids your age have it. The atmosphere in the house is tense, and you and your parent aren't communicating very well about anything these days.

UNIT 8 – MISSING

Unit 9: Mediation & Peaceful Communities

Goals:
Students will…

Become familiar with the process of mediating other people’s conflicts,

with the larger goal of empowering them to solve conflicts that occur both

among their peers, and in their larger communities and in the world.

Learn what mediation is and its importance in solving the conflicts of other people.
Learn how to be peer mediators, through going over the steps of mediation and learning when to use mediation.
Practice mediation by applying it in role-plays of both interpersonal and community conflict.
Collectively identify an important issue in their community and attempt to mediate that issue.

Materials

Article about Martin Luther King and non-violence: http://familyeducation.com/article/0,1120,1-4652,00.html?relinks, http://www.nytimes.com/learning/general/onthisday/bday/0115.html (appendix)
Article about peer mediator (copies for whole class), with steps of peer mediation on the back.

Methods

I. Opening Activity/Engage Students: Articles: Cases of past & present use of non-violence to solve conflicts

II. What is mediation? (definition, procedure, and rules)

III. Mediating Peer Conflicts: Martin Luther King Jr. Role Play & “Board” Game

IV. Community Meeting: Mediation on a large scale

Preparation

Read over entire lesson carefully, including articles in appendix.
Make sure you thoroughly read and understand the process of mediation and when it should be used.
Be prepared to suggest issues to the class to discuss in the community meeting, hopefully having spoken to the classroom teacher about this the week before.

I. Opening Activity/Engage Students: Articles: Cases of Past and Present Use of Non-Violence to Solve Conflicts

(Estimated time for activity, 10 minutes)

Volunteer Leading this Activity____________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity______________________

Activity Goals:

Demonstrate the validity of solving conflicts between both peers and entire communities through non-violent means
.Present an “everybody’s doing it” model for peaceful behavior, and show that it’s “cool” to be a mediator
Introduce the idea of peer mediation.

First read MLK article (everyone should have a copy, with mediation steps on back).

Explain how MLK was a non-violent leader in the 1960s Civil Rights Movement.

Then say that such efforts are still going on today, even by more minor young people
their age. Then read “skydiving article” (appendix). Either have students take turns reading, or read aloud.

Discussion of Articles

Why do you think MLK was successful, and why he didn’t need to use

violence?

What were the methods he used to solve people’s conflicts non-violently?
What do you think you can do in your communities to help prevent violence? (connect this to the letters they wrote to the mayor.)
How can you inspire other kids your age not to be violent?
Is it considered “uncool” not to be violent? How can you overcome that at school?

II. What is Mediation? Definition, Procedure, and Rules

(Estimated time, 5 minutes)

Volunteer Leading this Activity____________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity______________________

Activity Goals:

Define mediation
Go over steps/process of mediation
Connect mediation to negotiation
Go over ground rules of mediation
Make students see the importance of mediation and how they might use it in their lives.

Define mediation (relate to articles, also look at mediation process sheet in as reference):

Mediation is a step-by-step process for helping other people work out their problems, using the steps of I DID IT below:

Introduce yourself and explain that you will help solve the problem.

Define ground rules: explain guidelines for how disputants should behave.

Information from the disputants: have them tell their sides of the story

Define and clarify the main problem based on these stories: ask questions to clarify, summarize everything that was said.

Ideas: brainstorm fair solutions to the problem.

Test/Think about the solution: will it work? Is it realistic?

If all these steps are followed and a good solution is reached, you may want to write a formal agreement between the 2 disputants explaining how they will solve their problem.

Show how steps of negotiation & mediation are parallel by reviewing the major steps of negotiation from the last lesson. How are mediation and negotiation similar? (steps of process). Different? (solving your own problems versus other people’s).

Brainstorm what some of the ground rules should be for a mediator.

o Emphasize not taking sides! You might have an opinion about who is right, but you still should not take sides because that’s not helpful

o Do not interfere when your help is not wanted

o Both sides need to agree to mediation

Brainstorm what the ground rules should be for disputants in the conflict you are mediating. Relate this to what they’ve been doing all along when they resolve conflicts in PXP.

o No name-calling or put-downs

o No interrupting when someone else is talking

o Be as honest as you can

o No physical fighting or threats

o Agree to try to solve the problem

o Speak directly to mediator at first

Discuss when to be a mediator: ask students when they think they should step into a conflict, and which types of conflicts are appropriate for peer mediation.

o When 2 other people ask for your help in resolving a conflict

o When the conflict is not beyond your ability to solve (when drugs or domestic violence are involved, you should seek outside adult or professional help).

Ask kids to relate mediation to personal experience: Discuss what it’s like when 2 of their friends or family members are in a fight: is it hard not to take sides?

III. Mediating Peer Conflicts: Martin Luther King Role Play/ “Board” Game

(Estimated time, 20 minutes max)

Volunteer Leading this Activity____________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity______________________

Activity Goals:

Give students a chance to practice peer mediation and envision themselves as peer mediators.
Have students envision themselves in the role of a great advocate of non-violence.

Tell the students they will now practice the step-by-step process of mediation that is on their sheets.

Choose three volunteers. Two students will be assigned a hypothetical conflict which arose in school. A third student will act as a mediator, and try to give suggestions as to how the problem can be solved. Discussion will follow each skit.

Here is the scenario: Pretend you are Dr. Martin Luther King, and it is forty years in the past. You are living Selma, Alabama and when you are not busy with civil rights causes, you work as a mediator of students’ conflicts.

Rules:

For all visitors who come in with a problem, you must try to help them solve that problem.
Never permit violence as a solution. If someone threatens to use violence, you must sit him down, and explain why violence is never the way to approach conflict in your own words.
All the rules of peer mediation also apply here.

One teacher should take the two volunteers who are acting out the conflict aside and

explain to them their scenarios. They will need to explain the scenario in their own

words to the mediator. The mediator will then go through the “I DID IT” process to

help them solve the problem. The teacher leading the activity can remind the mediator

of the steps of mediation if necessary to help him/her through the process.

Scenarios:

1. Student A heard today from a friend that Student B said Student A’s

girlfriend/boyfriend was ugly. After school, Student A challenged

Student B to a fight at five o’clock behind the school. When they

started shoving each other, a teacher from their school made them go

see Dr. King (but they’re still planning on fighting tomorrow).

2. Student A and Student B used to be friends, but now they want to join

rival gangs. As part of his initiation, Student A must bring a gun to

school and threaten Student B. A friend of both students heard about

the initiation and went to the principal of the school. The principal

made them go see Dr. King.

3. Student A kept bullying Student B—calling him names, forcing him to

hand over his lunch money every day, etc. One day Student B got

angry and punched Student A. A teacher intervened and made them

go see Dr. King.

Use board-game style diagram simultaneously with role-play

2 stick figures represent the 2 disputants, Student A and Student B.
The figures move closer to a center point, or “common ground.”

o _ _ _ _ __ _ _ _ _ o

There is one line for each step of mediation, and the goal is to reach the center.
The figures move closer for following the rules, and move back a step when the mediator or disputants break a rule.

For example, Student A moves closer for explaining his/her side of the argument. But Student B moves back for interrupting Student A.

The class decides if the people move forward or back with each sentence

Discussion

What challenges did you face when mediating? How did you overcome them?
What did you do or observe that made mediation successful or unsuccessful?
Do you think you will use these techniques in your own classroom?

IV. Mediation on larger scale: Community Meeting

(Estimated Time, 15 minutes max)

Volunteer Leading this Activity____________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity______________________

Activity Goals:

Try solving broader community-wide issues through the mediation process.
Identify important issues in your community and come up with solutions.

Tell students they will be doing the same thing as small-scale mediation, only in the real world, on a large scale.

o This is sort of like writing a letter to the mayor, except now the mayor is actually participating in an argument with the people in the community about what to do about the issue you wrote about in your letter.

Assign the students an issue that might generate debate between the side of the

government and the side of students/parents/community, or let them choose, depending on the class. Sample issues could be:

o Lack of funding to renovate part of their school

o Lack of adequate books & supplies in classrooms

o Too many students in each classroom

o Drug use in their neighborhood

o High crime rate in neighborhood

** Note: Check with the classroom teacher the week before to approve this topic, so that no one is offended by it, and the students are not discussing something anyone would consider inappropriate. However, do not be afraid to address controversy. You can also can ask teachers for ideas.

Review what types of issues are non-negotiable and cannot be compromised (i.e., the safety of your family). (relate to communication lesson)
Constituent Meetings

Divide the class into 3 even groups: Kids/Parents, Mediators, and Government/school/other authority representatives.
Each group will meet with the guidance of one PXP teacher, read their information packs and prepare for the Town Meeting based on the questions in their information packs. During the constituent meetings, one person from every group should serve as the recording secretary and the group should decide who will speak as the representative.
Mediators should also meet and decide on a set of rules for their meetings, how they are going to run the meeting, and strategies for getting the groups to compromise. These rules should be based on the rules and procedures they have on their mediation sheets. They should come up with a list of potential compromises. Allow 5 minutes for the constituent meetings.

Questions for each group are listed below. The questions are also in the information pack to be given to each group.

1. Summarize who you are and what values are important to your group

2. What is your group's position on the issue?

3. What are the three most important values or interests to your group?

4. What interests are you willing to compromise or give up? What interests are you unwilling to negotiate or give up?

5. What suggested compromises can your group come up with?

(Helpful Hint: Depending on the abilities of your class, you should amend these questions. Some classes will only be able to answer questions 1,2, and 5 whereas other classes will be able to handle questions 3 and 4. Use your judgement!)

Town Meeting

o Set up the desks in a square shape. Have groups sit next to each other. Explain that we will now have a town meeting to try to work out a solution. Have the mediators run the meeting as best they can by introducing their rules and calling on one representative from each interest group.

o Each of the 2 groups should present their answers to the questions. One person should speak from each group. Have all groups answer question 1 before going on to question 2. Try to have the groups come up with a compromise. This is the goal of the activity.

V. Discussion/Review Questions/closing

(Estimated time, 5 min)

Volunteer Leading this Activity____________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity______________________

Activity Goals:

Review and discuss what happened in the game
Relate game to peer mediaton
Relate game to real life
Brainstorm how to take leadership in your community to help solve problems like this.
Review lesson as a whole.

Allow the town meeting to continue as long as it is being productive. When you feel that the groups have exhausted discussion and compromise, stop the meeting and break the simulation. Try to foster discussion with the following questions:

1. What was it like defending your group's point of view? Was it difficult? Why?

2. What was the biggest obstacle to settling on a compromise? What obstacles do communities in general face when they are trying to get things done?

3. Can you think of similar situations where there are different groups with Competing interests? What other problems in New Haven are similar? What are the different groups involved? What compromises or solutions have been created?

4. Can you relate this large-scale mediation to anything you’ve done with your peers or in your own community?

5. What steps can you take as students to deal with some of these types of issues in your communities?

BEFORE YOU GO:

· Tell the class when you will be coming next

· Talk with the classroom teacher about how the lesson went.

· Write notes for yourselves on how the different activities went.

Unit 10

Game-Making and Conclusion

Goals:

The students will…

Review everything they’ve learned about conflict resolution during Peace by Peace.
Create a Peace Game to play at the Festival.

Materials:

Your game materials:______________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Methods:

Part 1

I. Opening Activity: Extra Game (Circular Ball Toss)

II. Concept Brainstorm

III. Game Brainstorm

IV. Assignments

Part 2

I. Design the Game

II. Olivia’s Game

Preparation:

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Week 1, Part 1: Brainstorming the Game

I. Opening Activity: Extra Game

(estimated time, 15 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Engage the students.
Remind the students of how Peace Games work.

Choose a game to play with the students. This could be one of their favorites, or you can choose one of the games from the “Extra Game” section of the Appendix. One game you might want to choose is the Circular Ball Toss or Counting to 10.

Circular Ball Toss

Game goals:

Work together and cooperate.
Communicate well.

To play the game:

Gather the students in a circle.
Tell them you will pick a person at random, call out their name, and toss the ball to them.
The student with the ball should pick another person at random, call out their name, toss the ball to them, then sit down on the floor.
This will continue until everyone gets the ball at least once. Each person should get just one turn.
Every time the ball is dropped, start over.

When the students can do this without dropping the ball, then add a second ball (so two games are happening at once in the same circle). If this is successful, add a third ball.

If the ball gets dropped, ask what could have been done to keep from dropping the ball?

Working together, cooperation, better communication.

After the game, ask the students:

What was hard about this game?
What would have made it work better?
What does it have to do with conflicts?

Working together and communicating are de-escalators.

Counting to Ten

Game goals:

Working together.
Communication.

Break the class into two groups. Each group needs to count to ten aloud as a group, but only one person can talk at one time. Each person can say only one number. Every time two people talk at the same time, the counting has to start over.

After the kids are unsuccessful a few times, stop them and ask what they could do better to be successful:

They could work together, communicate better, etc.
They could work out a system of eye contact or pointing, etc.

II. Concept Brainstorm

(estimated time, 15 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Review what the students have learned in Peace by Peace.
Pick a concept for the class game.

Ask the students what they have learned in Peace by Peace. Go around the room and have each student reply; write their answers on the board. When the class is out of ideas, ask them about the point of specific games until they come up with all the important concepts from each lesson:

Unit 1: Conflict Tree/Conflict Staircase/Escalation and De-escalation
Unit 2: Jonesboro – real world violence
Unit 3: 5 Conflict Strategies
Unit 4: Self Esteem/Self Respect/Bullying
Unit 5: Communication
Unit 6: Overcoming Stereotypes
Unit 7: Looking at problems from different perspectives
Unit 8: Steps of Negotiation
Unit 9: Mediation and Peaceful Communities

Tell the students that they will be creating a game to present at the Festival.

As a reward for their hard work, we host a Festival for them in the spring. During the festival, all the students from all the Peace by Peace classes in New Haven come to Yale for the day. They go through really fun workshops put on by different Yale groups like sports teams and dance groups. They also play the Peace Games designed by all the classes.

Ask the students to pick which concept they want to design their game around. You may need to hold a vote.

III. Game Brainstorm

(estimated time, 15 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Design a game to make for the Festival.

Ask the students to now brainstorm different games that could cover this topic. Pick a game for the class to make as a whole. Make sure to consider the logistics of making the game: if you can find the materials, if it will be fun and safe, if it is feasible.

IV. Assignments

(estimated time, 5-10 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Ensure that the game will be able to be created the next week.

Figure out what has to be done to make this game, what materials need to be obtained and who will bring them (if the students will be bringing any). Give out assignments if needed.

Week 2, Part 2: Creating the Game

I. Design the Game

(estimated time, 30 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

Work together as a class to design the Peace Game.

Prepare the game for the Festival. Students should design a poster explaining the rules and objectives of their Peace Game so other people can play it when they’re not around.

If there is enough time, the students can play their own game.

II. Concluding Activity: …

(estimated time, 20 min)

Volunteer Leading this activity _________________________________________

Estimated time for your class to complete this activity _______________________

Activity Goals:

[Olivia to design this]

The volunteers will…

Unit 3

Strategies for dealing with conflict

o Review last lesson (quickly!) while passing out handouts [[unless you are ultra-prepared and already have the sheets on the desks, AS YOU SHOULD]],

II. Five Ways of Resolving Conflict: Role-play and Discussion

(estimated time, 15 – 35 min)

Goals: The students will…

· define the five strategies of conflict management through role-play

· discuss and understand when & why to use each strategy

This activity includes scripted role-plays & discussion.

· introduce: “while you act in these or watch these role-plays, think about the different ways a conflict can be handled”

· remind students of role-play rules: always follow script; no physical contact…

· if your kids can handle individual, unsupervised group work, give them time to prepare / discuss skits, in pairs – if not, just choose students & have them read off sheet in front of class

· after each role-play:

· ask: “What just happened?” (have students quickly describe in their own words)

IV: Closing: Apply Strategies: Return to Worksheet, Discussion

How important is this goal?_______How important is this relationship?________

Which strategy should you use?

Which answer is which strategy?

Racism is everyone’s problem: The Hurricane (25 minutes)

The Hurricane, by Bob Dylan

Part 2

Week 1, Part 1: Brainstorming the Game

Circular Ball Toss

Counting to Ten

Week 2, Part 2: Creating the Game

How important is this goal?_How important is this relationship?__